Sunday, September 12, 2010

"The Learning Curve" Assignment

In his story, "The Learning Curve", David Sedaris goes into great detail about what kind of image he wants to present to his students. Write a paragraph describing the image you would want to portray of yourself in a particular situation. It can be funny, like "The Learning Curve", or it can be serious. You can write about any arena that you'd like, real or imagined. For example, you can invent a rock star persona for yourself or the image you'd like to present if you were the loving lapdog of an elderly woman. Be creative, and be very descriptive. Think about what clothes you might wear, what your voice would sound like, what you would want people to call you, etc, as Sedaris does in his story. Post your paragraph as a comment and include your name as it appears on the roster.

19 comments:

  1. After a bad break up I let my friends talk me into going out just so i would cheer up. Not knowing where we were going, i decided to let them dress me. They put me in the hottest outfit they could find, which was a fitted red dress and red heels. It was the prefect summer night so I knew it would be a night to remember. While i was waiting at the bar by the door I saw my ex walking in with another girl. This threw me off completely but i was not going to let that ruin my perfect night. Since I have the craziest friends, they decided to get on stage to dance and they dragged me up there with them too. I was ready to show him i was the happiest person in the world. Thankfully this worked like a charm just like i thought it would and he gave me a look that was full of regret. After a few drinks he was sloppy drunk and had the nerve to come up to me with his ratchet date and act like it was no big deal even though we had broke up the week before. I guess he thought i would be jealous but I'm not that type of girl. Even though i was both angry and upset, i decided to act as mature as possible and simply walked off with out saying a word. Since then he has been blowing up my phone but being the smart girl that I am I have not answered any of his calls.

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  2. In high school i took a cna class where we did clincals at ocshner hospital. I was excited & nervous at the same time, my teacher had explained to us how the nurses there were always mean to the clincal students cause they felt they were always in the way of there work. So when i home i was like when i got there i was gone to go and act like i was nurse just like them. Once we got there someone needed there vitual signs taken so my teacher choice me to take them, i got in the room with the patient and forgot everything my teacher had taught me, i froze up so bad i could barely talk to the patient to tell them what i was in there for, then my teacher came in and started to instruct me. The nurse was looking at me like this little girl doesnt even know what she is doing even though i did know what i was doin i was so focus on doing way more then what i was suppose to that i forgot what i suppose to do. But i think my whole class had that idea cause they all did the exact same thing as me.

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  3. As my first day of high school was approaching, I became very nervous but excited.All I could think about was what would be think of me and will I become cool with the upperclassmen? Over the summer all I could think about is will I fit in.On the first day of school I wore a white ralph lauren shirt with some khaki american eagle and the new jordans that had just been released the weekend before. Boy was I clean walking in those front doors of high school. As I walked down the hall all you can is "Yea! She clean.Her people must have a lil change with her dressing like that!" After that I knew I was apart of the fashion statements that floated around the school, so my big sister told me.After that first day I felt more comfortablee going to school knowing that I would make new friends by the way that I present myself, I was known to be cool, laid back, and a person you can always catch with a smile on her face.From freshman year to my senior year , I always tried to keep up with the latest fashion.

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  4. If I was in a simpler situation as he was teaching a class i would like to come off as nice, loving, and cool. But at the same time very down to earth and strict. I would wear my hair cut short and down. My voice would be soft and kind.Unless i really mean business then i would get loud and deepen my voice. I would wear heels for the first week or so and some slacks with a dressy shirt to give off a professional look. I would talk only to my students after work and assignments are done. I would try very hard to make sure they understood everything I taught. I would start friendly, soical conversatins after everyone was done with everything.I would want for the students to think I am cool and easy to get alone with. To get their attention when it was teaching time i would get unfriendly and very strict. Their would be no talking while i was up in front of the class teaching.

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  5. My name is Mrs. Minute Maid, and I am a English teacher that is 23 years old and I have been transfered from a Private school to an Alternative school for bad kids. If you saw me you would probably think I'm a student myself. Im short & small with long hair, and I wear glasses. I have a very soft voice, but when it comes to teaching, it gets very loud. I may look like the most scariest teacher ever, but I am a strong, small young lady. I want the students at my new school to see that I may look small and quiet but I can be very mean when you do not follow my rules in my class. I'm the type of teacher that will wear a nice shirt and some jeans to class and never try to dress to impress my students. If you respect me and my classroom, you shouldn't have any problems wit me or my class. I do not believe in doing work on Fridays, I feel like that is a day to just take a break, which means me & my students, & that day will be called Doughnut day. Overall, I really am a cool teacher, I just try to be strong and hard on my students to show them that I care and I did not come to play, I came to teach & help them be successful in life.

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  6. If i was in a similar situation like Mr. Sedaris i would do the opposite of everything he did. His students did not respect him. My students would have to respect me. My passing students would call me by my first name Raymond and my students who are not passing would call me Mr. Heard. I would show favoritism to all the pretty girls. If you was ugly you would not be allowed to enter my class. I would be like this real famous Rockstar and all the girls would love me. My voice would be so high pitch it woul sound like i was singing. I would come to class with my shirt off and show all of my tattoos. Evertone would like me. The lesson plan would be to look at me and name some of my songs.

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  7. If I were in the similar situation as Mr.Sedaris I would have played it cool. I would have introduced myself in a deep monotone voice and would have made my class very interesting. I would have told the class to seperate, boys on one side girls on the other. Then I have made an assignment making the students to get to know each other and ask each other question. Each group would go up and introduce the partner, thus making the class get along. Far as the funny stuff, it would have to come natural.I like to freestyle alot of things, so getting my class to joke and have fun would be a spur of the moment kind of thing. I would also come dressed in a casual white v neck, some 501 levi's, and some fly nikes !! Gotta stay fresh for the kids..

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  8. I was so excited when prom time came around. I rounded up all of my friends and my boyfriend and my daddy even rented a limo bus for us. So the night before prom, my boyfriend called me. For some strange reason he started yelling and cursing me and said he refuses to kiss any girl's ass and he that was not comming to prom with me. I was so devistated! I didn't even want to go to my senior prom anymore. But I had to be strong for my friends who were riding in the bus with us... I mean with me. I didn't want anyone to think i would let a guy break me! So I told my friends that I was perfectly fine with going to prom alone so we all went. Every single thing about prom made me wanna cry but I hid my feelings by smiling and laughing and dancing my ass off the whole night. Everybody dance with me and took pictures and we all agreed we were having the best night of our lives! At the end of the night the dj decided to play Usher's song "There Goes My Baby". I looked around and saw everybody slowly turning to their date smiling. All of a sudden I bursted into tears sitting at the table alone. Everyone knew what I was crying about.

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  9. Throughout high school I was known as the girl who was shy and quiet.My tenth grade year I wanted to break out of my shell and try something new. I decided to try out for the cheerleading squad at my school. I was very excited and scared at the same time. When I told people that I was trying out for the team they doubted me and told me that I wouldn't make the team. This was one time in my life when I wanted people to look at me as a outgoing teenager instead of the quiet girl.I ended up making the team and proving everybody wrong. I wasnt scared to be myself and for once I changed the way people looked at me.

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  10. When I was a young girl, my family always considered me as a tom-boy. I use to wear the up to date jordans and nikes, i would always wear my hair in a ponytail, no earrings or jewelry, etc. I just always thought when u dress up u was just a prissy, spoiled brat. My sisters always told me I would never have a boyfriend because guys hated that, but i was young and didnt care what they said. Later, in my teens, i started loving the color pink, purses, dresses, skirts, just anything a prissy girl would love! My sibilings were so shocked they thought I was clowning around with all these new girly clothes i bought. As high school came around i was the most prissy, spoiled brat in school. I never thought i would see myself as one of those girls, but i absoutley love it!

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  11. It was Halloween and my friends and I were invited to this Halloween House Party. My friend told me we should dress up as KID N' PLAY. So, I thought about it and I came up with a conclusion. I told my my home boy we can do that. He was all with it so we went get our gear on the streets of New Orleans. I went to Sports Plus and purchased some low-cut Nike SB's with the matching socks. Then I went to Urban Outfitter on the corner by the French Quarter and i got my shirt and my overalls looking like the 90's. After I left Urban Outfitter I went got dress and was watching KID N' PLAY on You tube learning their dances getting wasted on the Balcony at the Marquee apartments off of Poydras. We arrived to the party I was Kid and my home boy was Play and we was talking like each character and had a tricky treat pot of money to see who can get the most numbers. My home boy was feeling insecure on what he had on and i was confident and the females started dancing around me and I got a couple numbers so I beat him. I told him you don't worry about what people think and keep confidence and girls would feel you more.

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  12. Throughout high school, I was considered a very quite and shy guy. I walked around campus as more of a jock and leader trying to encourage my younger peers. Especially the ones that played either football or basketball because it was the two sports I loved. All of high school I was mostly known as the quite nice guy to many. This was only to the people that didn't know me as well. All of my closer friends and people that knew me well, already knew that this wasn't true at all. But senior year, I really broke out of my shell to the people who had never seen this side. I was participating in any and everything and being more outspoken than ever. The thing that shocked people was something they thought I would never do. It was a pagent show for our homecoming pep rally. I actually dressed up like a girl with a few other of my teamates like drag queens. Wearing dresses and heels, strutting down the runaway twisting and putting on a show as if we were auditioning for "America's Next Drag Model". Also about 15 minutes after that ended, a few of us put on a parody of our rival team. Dressing up as their cheerleaders that we thought look tore down and raggedy with masculine features. The whole school loved it. My senior year was great, and to many I came out of my shy and quiet personality that I was known for most of my years of high school.

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  13. If I were a teacher i would definitely try to be the opposite of Mr. Sedarius. He tried to show the students that he was all about authority and when he did that it just made him look dumb. I would be very relaxed and chill almost all of the time. Even though I would be very laid back I would still make sure whatever the students needed to do got accomplished. I believe that if I took the laid back approach towards the class that the students would see me as one of the "cooler" teachers.

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  14. Its late and the crowded Las Vegas bar was roaring with excitement from the die hard fans. It was so loud you could almost feel the heat from the breath of all the fans cheering. Oversized mugs spilling over with beer were raised in the air all over the bar. Both players looked full of beer as they raised their balls to try to sink the last cup and win the International Beer Pong Tournament. It took pure skill alone to remain standing after throwing back all of the foamy cups of Bud Light. My opponent took aim and released the ball. As the orange ping pong ball sailed through the air it was as if time was moving in slow motion. A thousand prayers came from my head as I was hoping for him to miss. My heart went back to beating only until I heard the ball hit the Beer Pong table. I knew it was my turn to end the game and make my opponent drink his loser cups. The crowd was behind me and everyone was on end as I raised my hand and practiced my shot. It was now or never. I cursed my opponent out as I let the ball fly out of my hand in into his cup. The crowd went wild.

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  15. I always wanted to be a millionaire but i didnt quite know how to become one. one of my friends name malcolm little had a bright idea he told me how to rob a bank so i thought it was a good idea. so malcolm and i were going to the bank ready to rob it next. thing u know out of know where the bank was giving out free money to who ever open up a account so i had a bright idea to rob everybody who open up a account so i grab my aka 47 out of my car and shot everybody who was at the bank and i was straight every since and u call me the next bill gates.

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  16. The year 1978, the place downtown New York. Kiss was performing in their annual concert and I had backstage passes. I had been a fan ever since the formation of the band in 1973. I had already been prepared for the show, being that I won the tickets on the radio. I had everything; the leather pants with the metal buckles on the side, the leather vest with metal clips everywhere, the pale white costume makeup, and the black eye make up. Excited as ever. I got dressed and headed downtown for the show. The show started at 8 pm, I was there for 6:45. I walked in, and saw posters for a dating service. I was so embarassed! It was a formal event and I was dressed as Gene Simmons. My stomach shot to my feet like a rocket returning from orbit. At least I had on make up and was unrecognizable by everyone. The radio tickets turned out to be tickets for the annual KISS speed dating social network.

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  17. I always wanted to be a high school basketball head coach. A very dtermined coach who was wise like Coach Roy Williams. Who would always have passion for the game. A coach who never seemed satisfied. Like a stubborn 14 year old who always gets what she wants but never seems satisfied. Everytime I would speak the whole team would stop whatever they were doing and listen up. The power I would have over my team was like the power the great Martin Luther King Jr. gave us during his I have a dream speech.

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  18. I always wanted to know what dogs had to say about their owners. What if I were a dog named Poofy, and my owner was chubby and rich. What if she dressed me up in these ugly ass clothes. Do you think that the dog likes the name Poofy, hell no. What would you do if one day you enter your house and say "Poofy mommy's home" and you hear the words "Aww Fxck, the big bxtch is home, and she is still calling me Poofy. Damn I hate that name! From now on, you call me Roc, and if you don't I'll start pissing on everything in this joint, comprende' What the hell do you want Eileen?, shxt, I'm laying down." You would lose your mind, wouldn't you. I think that would be the funniest thing ever.

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  19. If I was teacher, I would be a P.E teacher. I would really push sports upon the kid at my school. I would try to encourage all of the young men to play sports. What many men dont know is that sports can get you a long way in life. Many kids who play sports got a chance to go to college just because they can dribble a basketball. Most great atletes cant even read and write properly. Ron Artest for example: After the Lakers won the championship, the interviewed Artest, and he basily made a complete fool of his self. Atletes like that would really inspire the students to be "student atletes". It makes a big difference. I feel i would really make a big change. Many good atletes from the hood dont make it to show their full potential. Ill do my best to make a better life for them. THE END

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